​The wicked lack eyes of faith. They look to the Lord and see one who is opposed to them. They see a man who judges them harshly. They see a man who is nothing more than an obstacle to their happiness. They blame Him for holding them to a higher standard. They mock His knowledge of the Father, and in that the Love of the Father. They test His gentleness, and His patience. They condemn Him. They were blinded by their lack of faith. 

It stings to think about how blatantly the wicked turn their backs on the Righteous One in the first reading. It hurts to think that some believe that the Lord is in opposition to our good, while the Lord is the greatest good. My heart aches thinking about the pain the wicked must accept in rejecting the Fatherhood of God. They turn their back on love itself…

But I am not perfect, sometimes I am plagued with struggles. When we desperately pray for some end, and the opposite comes about, don’t we for a second question if God is present to that situation, and if He is there do we question if He’s a good God. Lord, I only asked for this one thing! Why are you punishing me? If friendships we become comfortable with begin to fray, or responsibilities of life weigh us down, do we not challenge God in disdain that He may be calling us to grow closer to Him in these sacrifices? Even if it seems we whole heartedly believe in the Love of the Father, do we not question our goodness, doubting that we are worthy to be held by Love itself? When we are tired, lonely, hurt, or frustrated do we not turn our eyes away from the consoling Heart that beats for us? 

In our brokenness, we are not totally opposed to the views of the wicked ones who lack faith, but the difference is glaring…We long to raise our eyes up to the One who is Mercy itself. We know our weakness, but we trust Jesus enough to allow Him to gaze into our souls and declare that we are good. Let Him see you. Let Him love you. When the Lord closes a door on something we hoped for, even if it stings, we open wide our eyes to see which greater entrance He is calling us to enter through. We are not perfect, but our God is. We may hurt, doubt, or challenge…But the Lord heals, speaks truth, and brings deep rest. 

On this journey to Calvary let us draw near to the One who knows us and loves us, just as we are. 

Where in my life do I act like the wicked and turn my back on God?

When I struggle, how can I use it as an opportunity to increase my faith?

How can I let God into my brokenness today?

"Give me rest." 

"Heal my blindness." 

​"God longs for me."

Today, when you start to feel angry, upset or stressed give that moment to God and ask Him to increase your strength. 

There’s a lot happening in the first reading, so let’s break it down a bit.

The people of this time were used to having gods represented by a physical “thing”, and that’s ultimately what led to making the golden calf while Moses was gone; they were looking for a way to represent God as a thing they could see and touch, and therefore better understand. 

While they never meant to turn away from God, that ended up happening due to lack of proper guidance. Instead of saying “Look at this cow, which represents the awesome God that saved us!”, the Israelites said “Look at this cow, which is the awesome god that saved us!”. And that caused problems. Because God had already warned the Israelites against doing this exact thing, that caused many problems. The Israelites never meant to turn away from God, but because they got so carried away by pagan customs/ways of doing things, that’s what ended up happening. This idolatry is why God became so upset; His people were disobeying and replacing Him, basically worshiping whatever was nearest to them. And naturally we still struggle with this today.

Yet we also see the profound effect of prayer in Moses' conversation with God. In fact, some scholars argue that God never really intended to punish the Israelites. But by using this approach, by putting Moses in the position to protect His people by pleading on their behalf, God was showing Moses that his prayers have direct and very real consequences. And that’s huge. 

Take this in for a second. God could certainly do everything on His own, but He loves us so much that He wants us to get directly involved. You genuinely and tangibly have a way to have a profound effect on the universe as a whole and on the individual lives around you. All you need to do is ask. God showed Moses the consequences of praying, and how our prayer, even as imperfect little humans, can be the means to let the will of God happen. Everything that happens needs to have a “cause” or “beginning”, and God’s lets our prayers be some of those causes. As in, some things physically rely on our prayers to happen.

Overall, there are two big themes here. The first is that the Israelites took something good, something intended to bring glory to God, and fell into idolatry by becoming too focused on it. Is there anything in your life that you hold too highly, to the point of caring about it too much? How is Lent helping you address that? 

The second is that our prayers truly have an effect; that a perfect God loves us so intensely and personally that He allows us to literally be a pathway, a means for His Will to be done. Without us, it wouldn’t happen the same way. So yes, your prayers matter. A lot. Not only is God listening to what you have to say, but He’s letting your prayers have a lasting impact on the world around you. Are you praying like your prayers actually matter? Do you pray as if God is genuinely listening to you? 

So, read the first reading again. Which aspect of the reading seems to be affecting you most? Wherever you are, use Moses and the Israelites as an example of how (or, in the Israelites case, how not) to move forward from here.

Is there anything in your life that you hold too highly, to the point of caring about it too much? How is Lent helping you address that? 

Are you praying like your prayers actually matter? Do you pray as if God is genuinely listening to you? If not, how can you change that?

How can you be like Moses and intercede on behalf of the people in your life? How can you also, gently and with love, help those people see the wrong in their ways? ​

"Here I am Lord."

"Forgive me Lord."

​"Teach me how to pray."

Find a new way to pray for others today. Let yourself take the role of an intercessor and ask people how you can pray for them today, then actually do it.

Sometimes, we get really focused on results. From the time we're young, we are rewarded based on how good we are at things: trophies get bigger when you do better, you get praised when you get A's in school, and people take note when you improve how well you score goals or play your instrument. In a certain sense, there is a positive thing to this: hard work pays off, and it is good when people notice our hard work. 

In another sense, though, this can become very damaging for us. We begin to think that our worth is completely dependent upon how successful we can be and how much people take notice of our ability. As we begin to think like that, we become simply functional animals; we're all about getting tasks accomplished and finding our way to the finish. Until we've met each and every one of our goals, and we have the praise of those around us and the rewards for what we've done, there can never be time to rest. 

The prophetic words from Isaiah that we read today speak directly into that problem and remind us that, in the eyes of the Father, we are not asked to successfully complete tasks before we can receive our rest. Isaiah reminds us that the Lord specifically comes to people in their desolation, when they are prisoners, and when they are in darkness to help them find the place of rest and the water to drink. 

How have you let your worth be defined not by the eyes of the Father but instead by the value that the world gives you?

Along the ways they shall find pasture,
on every bare height shall their pastures be.

The Lord offers pasture not simply at your destination, but along the way. Stop trying to prove anything, stop trying to earn His grace, and simply find your rest, your pasture, in the arms of the Father that hold you and remind you everything is okay. Maybe during this Lent you've found yourself bogged down and stressed; in the midst of this time, let the Lord give you the rest, the pasture, that He desires for your heart. You don't have to earn it, He simply wants to give it. Rest in Him.

How have you let your worth be defined not by the eyes of the Father but instead by the value that the world gives you?

What ways does the Lord want to give you rest right now? Speak to Him about the suffering and stress you feel and let Him speak into that place in your heart. 

When you think of God the Father, what picture do you have of Him in your mind? Is He a good, loving Father? If that's not what you say, why are you struggling to see Him for the good and loving Father He is? Take time to pray with that idea, and look at the Father so that He can look at you. 

"You give me rest."

"You lead me to green pastures."

​"You are my Father."

Find time to rest today. In the midst of your busyness, stop. Turn off your devices, and let yourself be quiet and just be with the Lord. Speak to Him, and then be quiet and let Him speak to you. 

​Where does the life-water in your life flow from?

For a Jewish person in the time of Ezekiel, this reading would have been rich with relatable metaphors and symbolism. You could spend an endless amount of time diving into the depth of this reading, but one thing stuck out to me - something that I think we all need to really consider today. Where does the water that give us life flow from?

I have been really blessed to have had the opportunity for both life coaching and spiritual direction this past year or so (which I strongly encourage you all to take advantage of - especially spiritual direction). I thought I was a pretty self-aware person before all of that, but since then I can really understand why I do what I do, because I know where my life and motivation comes from. I have come to realize that my “primary motivator” is my relationship with others and that self-gain or personal achievements mean much less to me. That is not necessarily better or worse, that is just who I am. But why would that matter to thousands of people - most of whom I have never met? The particulars don’t matter… but what does matter is that I know how to find motivation when I need it, and I can see when water flows from areas that are not as pure and sincere. I know the source, and that changes everything.

Even greater than knowing where my motivation comes from, I have learned where my life comes from - where our life comes from. My life-water flows straight from the heart of Jesus - from Love itself - and most tangibly in the Eucharist. The Eucharist is the “source and summit of our faith,” but not only our faith - our lives too. If we try to run to any “river” or “stream” that is not flowing directly from the Eucharistic Heart of Jesus, then we will always be left thirsting for more. It is the only source for true life and water that can nourish and sustain that life. “I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.” (John 10:10) The only way we can have that abundantly life is to run to the river of His love and mercy.

Learn the source of things in your life. Learn the source of your life itself. Because when we know the source everything else begins to make sense. When we know the source of everything - God - life begins to have new meaning. Find the source of your life-water.

These questions are to be used to talk to God; have a conversation with the Lord about these questions and what is going on in your heart as you pray today.

​Where does the water that gives you life flow from?

What is your primary motivator in life? What is the source of your life?
​
What are you thirsting and longing for? Have you been running to the stream of life-giving water? 

In this step, you listen. Stop talking, let God speak to your heart. You may repeat one of these short phrases to focus your mind on the Lord.

​​"I long for an abundant life."

"I long for the life-giving water."

"I long for you, God."

In light of today's reading and your time spent in prayer with the Lord, what concrete action or actions will you take to let this encounter with the Lord bear fruit in you today?

Take a look at your life and what gives you life. Think about where the Lord fits into that picture. Allow the Lord to be the one to give you life and nourish you through the Eucharist.